We've been hearing a lot about feminism lately and of course whenever a woman asserts herself in the business world it seems she is quickly labeled the "ugly" word feminist. Why is feminism such a dirty word? And why does this place women at a disadvantage? What do women have to loose as a result of this unfair double standard?
It is true that we live in a man's world and that women generally are treated as "inferior" to men. The facts are undeniable.......women still earn only 78 cents for every dollar earned by a man. They occupy only 15.2% of seats on fortune 500 corporate boards and serve as CEO for only 3% of the country's largest corporations. 51% of families living below the poverty line are headed by women as are 83% of single parent families. More than a quarter million women are sexually assaulted each year in the US alone and in 2008 nearly 12,000 reported suffering from sexual harassment. Studies show that when a female professor enters the classroom, students presume her to be less competent than an equally certified male and pay more attention to whether she smiles. Women are not acknowledge for their accomplishments and talents as much as they are for their attractiveness and sex appeal. Unfortunate for women we are taught to be the nurtures and to be "nice" looking out for the needs of others first before our own. We are taught that the only way to get a man is through sex and we are made to feel as though we are at fault when a divorce happens. Granted our culture has made some progress and more and more woman are learning that it is ok to asserts themselves, notwithstanding the criticism they will receive when they do. Women are forced to live their lives differently on the account of their sex.
Feminism is about equality with a man. It is about a women who will not tolerate a man who looks down on her and will act accordingly to let him know she is his equal. It is about a woman who asserts her worth on par with a man. In other words, she knows she is competent, intelligent, and quite capable of taking care of business (she can hold down the fort when he's not there) and she does not need a man to determine her existence as a woman. Rather she chooses a man to complement her, not validate her. Contrary to what some believe, feminism is not about a hatred of men or the traditional roles that society dictates us to have. I believe most men enjoy being masculine and most women enjoy being feminine. Unfortunately though at times feminine submission results in exploitation and being taken advantage of and marriage is no guarantee of financial security. Men loose jobs just as women do, sometimes through no fault of their own and I believe both sexes enjoy contributing their intelligence and ideas and creativity to the world around them. According the book, "Feminism Mystique" by Betty Friedan, women who had children and husbands they adored still felt empty and unsatisfied. So they searched for a sense of fulfillment that didn't come from being a server of food and wiping wet noses. Women wanted more..........they wanted lives and careers of their own, ideas that they would create and utilize to bring their contributions to the world around them. But rather than pursuing their dreams, women across America were routinely entrapped by the feminine mystique convincing them that ecstasy came in cleaning powder and fulfillment lay in serving others. Granted both sexes should learn about serving others.........this enables us to be less selfish but we should not develop a "Mother Theresa" syndrome to the extent that we negate our own needs and desires.
It is ironic that the very jobs that women need are the ones now being filled by men. These men are doing traditionally female jobs because our economy has shifted from a producing country to a consuming country. Our manufacture base has been shifted overseas so most of our blue-collar jobs traditionally dominated by men are no longer available, so men are forced into careers conventionally done by women such as nursing and caregiving. Unfortunate for women though, when they try to pursue unconventional careers that are traditionally dominated by males (such as STEM careers), they are confronted with a steady stream of harassment, insults, and mockery. So what's a women to do when she sees men taking the jobs that she needs and observes him being treated with respect but if she pursues a career that is dominated by men but is subjected to constant harassment? She is forced to be "unfeminine" and assert herself otherwise she will be din-din. It is learned behavior.
In 1947, two prominent psychologists published "Modern Woman....The Lost Sex." In their treatise they described feminism as a deep illness and warned any woman who fell prey to it's temptations was neurotically disturbed and likely afflicted with a case of penis envy! (I can think of some men who still think this way). Feminists were considered loud, pushy, strident and unfeminine. Society dictated them to be ladylike or classy. But this once again leaves woman at a disadvantage because whats a woman to do when she gets angry? If she suppresses it, she will more than likely suffer from depression. Both sexes get angry, it is a God-given emotion but trouble begins when men are given a pass and woman are not. A strong woman should have no problem expresses her concerns and should in no way be made to feel that she is wrong in doing so because if so, then that clearly is wrong. Woman want their voice to be heard as much as men do. Decades earlier, when a girl announced that she wanted to be a lawyer or a doctor, she likely would have been ridiculed or at least talked out of her dream, so she would capitulate without her voice being heard.
Feminism started in the 60's but must be understood that is was distinct. It promoted the very identity of women, not necessarily the legal status of women or the political rights of women. As presented and distorted by the mainstream media, it was a feminism greedy to its core-proclaiming women could have money, children, sex and power along with fabulous shoes. Like men, women could have it all. But this is not the right kind of feminism. It is a misguided attempt at promoted equality with men. And worse yet, is this myth of feminine perfection that simply does not exist. Yet it is a lie that is still perpetuated through the business world, media, magazines, billboards and right into our very own relationships. The pressure that is put on women to look amazing, NO MATTER WHAT, is unequivocal. Even little girls are being showered with bling and shimmer and pouf and pink and fantasies around every corner, as the nursery rhyme ran, "sugar and spice and all things nice". It should really read......"sugar and spice, and NOT so nice." What these little girls are actually going to need is resourcefulness, competence, and a sense of achievement that extends beyond their looks. And they should not be raised to expect Prince Charming. Little boys should be taught to be emotional and both weak and strong because this is what makes us human beings. Again, it is equality, not typical gender stereo-types.
In our current world we assign stereo-types all the time. In fact it is quite ubiquitous. And rather than acknowledging that feminine perfection is a lie, we continue both to believe the myth and to feel guilty when we inevitable, inherently fall short of it! People need to separate fantasy from reality.
The Bible encourages us (men and women) to serve others, it in no way diminishes a woman's worth. In fact, woman are honored and Jesus always treated woman with great worth. After His resurrection, He appeared first to a woman and then told her to go tell the brethren. On a personal note, my filter is what God says in His Word and if He says that men and women have been created equal then that settles it for me........that is all I need to know. Therefore, I will act accordingly.
Personally, the feminism that should be promoted around the world is the women who are shunned or killed who dare to look at another man. Women who are denied education on the basis of their sex, women who are discriminated against and sexually harassed, women who are paid less than a man even though it is comparable work, single women needing tax benefits just as much as married couples, women who worry not about breast pumps but breasts that are too malnourished to feed their infants. And women who are sold into sex trafficking. Theirs are the real stories of women's struggles and the real motivation for an action-oriented feminism.
